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Kiwifarms Gossip & Slap Fights KF General 2.0

These threads cover general gossip and interacting with Kiwifarms (openly calling them out).
Subtitle
The new declines of Kiwifarms
Time 4 MAPs said:
I ride Josh's meat because he's my fat pedo daddy.
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This person wrote an essay on unthoughtful gift giving plus their MIL's cookbook addiction and the whole reddit general thread is now debating whether the redditor who claimed gifts are being forced on him is a faggot or has a point.
eDove said:
I mean, this is the kind of gift most people prefer these days. If you don't know what to get someone, that's a pretty safe bet.

I understand the frustration of the initial post though, and I don't like the accusation that opposing bad gifts is inherently ungrateful. A lot of people are just bad at gift giving and they're shopping addicts who insist on buying you what makes them feel good. There's a stark difference between clueless but well-meaning gift givers and those who boundary stomp.

It's especially bad after having a kid because people you barely even know see it as an opportunity to unload mountains and mountains of crap on you, as well as buy cutesy but useless things in the droves.

I remember explicitly telling family members for months not to buy me baby clothes 'cause I knew I'd end up with piles of them in the form hand-me-downs and whatnot. Guess what? This request was ignored and I ended up with dozens and dozens of newborn-sized outfits that only fit my infant for a couple of weeks. Sure, I was able to offload some of the excess through a church, but that sort of thing can be a huge headache when you're in the postpartum stage. Ultimately, it was a waste of money that could've been spent on useful things for the baby, or just not spent at all.

My psychotic bitch of a mother-in-law, who my husband's since cut off like a tumor, started hating me when I asked her not to buy me cookbooks.

This woman was the worst cook I ever ate with, yet she hoarded cookbooks. She had a massive, awesome kitchen that she complained about being too small because her cabinets were STUFFED with cookbooks. I told her no, that I don't like cookbooks, that I get my recipes from the Internet and my mother. Even then, I use them as loose guidelines more than anything.

This made her so angry that she waited until I was out of town visiting family to swing by and leave cookbooks at our house (???). When I gave them back to the father-in-law, I heard she was massively offended. Of course, she never directly spoke to me about it despite having my number, she just seethed at him and my husband.

These situations happen and it's rude, plain and simple. It wasn't a real gift. A transaction occuring shouldn't take precedence over a person's wants, like "I spent money on this, therefore, you must accept it with a smile" is such a caustic attitude.

An obviously worse example is people buying recovering alcoholics expensive drinks to pull them back into it. I've seen this shit happen deliberately within families and it's not cute or loving.

My approach to giving gifts is asking myself: what would they want, but could never justify buying for themselves? And it doesn't have to be a physical gift. One Christmas, I bought my stressed out grandmother a spa day she could use at her leisure after vehemently saying "no gifts" in the weeks leading up to it. Needless to say, she was very happy. On her birthday, I bought her a cameo from Arthur Morgan's VA in RDR2 because she had a crush on the character, lol.

If someone doesn't want more crap, just give them money or an experience. Don't use them as a dumping ground or a springboard for your shopping addiction. The Redditor was definitely using melodramatic language, but I don't necessarily blame them.
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