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Meta Gaylord's Retarded Gutterlife

Subtitle
Or: A Ralpamales Journey

Moontroon

Daniel Lopez is a pedophile
Remarkable Onion
images-png.59668
Cool story bro
 

Moontroon

Daniel Lopez is a pedophile
Remarkable Onion
Oh yeah, I know it'd probably suck for a while but it'd be an interesting entry in my life story. I think I'm gonna try tapping into my beaner roots and try hitting some day labor. There's offices but I want to try flying a sign that says "Give Me A Job, Ya Bum", see what comes of it
Or, go back to Mexico where you belong, lazy beaner.
 

Time 4 Guillotines

An Onion Among Onions
Had a decent day yesterday, made enough on the corner to not need to worry for a few days. Still haven't been given the boot from my storage unit though I'm sure it's coming. Considering moving to a different side of town when it happens. I've heard good things about a particular area in regards to panhandling and according to the crime heat map it's the safest around. I suspect that also comes with an increased police presence but I'm not tripping about that. I knew before coming here that there's a disproportionate amount of property crimes but it's wild I was sitting in the unit right beside one that was getting busted into like only a week after being here.
But for now, going to keep grinding away on the corner and enjoying the amenities I've purchased until now longer available. Once my food stamps come in, I'll probably be a nigger and turn a portion of them into cash. Instead of 2:1 selling them though, I lurp around shopping centers until I find a large grocery receipt that paid cash, purchase the specific items from the receipt and walk back in the other door to return them.
 

Time 4 Guillotines

An Onion Among Onions
Ran into a hobo I met 7 years ago while hitching. He's absolutely fucked off the alcohol. Like nearing end stage alcoholism. He's alright though, as far as a hang, just incurably belligerent. Going to dip out on him shortly because his loud retard mouth is a cop magnet, which is the opposite of how I be trying to live
 

Time 4 Guillotines

An Onion Among Onions
I am so fucking tired of junkies, it's unreal.
I made it back to my storage unit right before close, get comfy, kick my shoes off, turn on my retarded podcast. Oh look, the motion detectors sensed someone lurping around the halls. I wait a few minutes, hear they haven't fucked off but also haven't opened a unit like a normal person would have.
I said fuck it, grabbed my important shit and bounced. After sitting literally right beside the unit the fucking meth niggers decided to hit last time, I'm fucking over it. On the way out, I see some mangy fuck just wondering around, basically shopping the units, looking spaced out.
I fucking hate these mother fuckers so much. Meth heads are above and beyond the worst part of being on the street and I would round them up and gas the fuck out of all of them well before any minority I might make jokes about.
I fucking hate meth heads so much, it's fucking unreal. Like at this point, fuck it, I'll go stay in the fucking shelter. That shit is like being in the loony bin without the added benefit of also being on drugs but it's better than staying in my little 5x5 unit worrying if some tweak nigger is going to try and bust in with a hammer.
 

Time 4 Guillotines

An Onion Among Onions
While I'm here, it fucking pisses me off how unfair shit is for someone even remotely trying to do right. If I would just Daniel Larson the fuck out, there would be basically zero worries. A nigga out here with aspirations of doing better again though, fuck no. The wingnuts and assorted fuck ups just sense it and want to come sit on my fucking lap, blowing up my fucking spot. Cops want to run my fucking name, stupid asshole yuppies think it's chill to fuck with me, etc.
It's incredibly frustrating 😠
No matter, I'll endure. But imma be scowling
 
So I ended up getting a job registering people to vote. It's a great gig that utilizes my panhandling+carnival barking skills, paying $20/hr. Only going to last until the end of October obviously but I've been putting up such strong numbers I think they might invite me to travel for other campaigns. Idk, pretty optimistic about the future. If I keep crushing it I suspect they'll offer me a supervisor position, which is $24/hr. Super stoked I found something decent that doesn't care about my background.
 

kiwifails

Meow
Hellovan Onion
So I ended up getting a job registering people to vote. It's a great gig that utilizes my panhandling+carnival barking skills, paying $20/hr. Only going to last until the end of October obviously but I've been putting up such strong numbers I think they might invite me to travel for other campaigns. Idk, pretty optimistic about the future. If I keep crushing it I suspect they'll offer me a supervisor position, which is $24/hr. Super stoked I found something decent that doesn't care about my background.
Is it canvassing?
 
Is it canvassing?
Yep. I've done it before on a few different campaigns but those were for political/ecological petitions. The last one I crushed so well they had to double the daily quota for everyone, which didn't make me popular with my coworkers but fuck em, they weren't the ones paying me.
This particular company I'm with is rather leftist and I might have to push shit like abortion bills or trans stuff but I'd commit war crimes for a Klondike Bar, so I don't really care
 

kiwifails

Meow
Hellovan Onion
Yep. I've done it before on a few different campaigns but those were for political/ecological petitions. The last one I crushed so well they had to double the daily quota for everyone, which didn't make me popular with my coworkers but fuck em, they weren't the ones paying me.
This particular company I'm with is rather leftist and I might have to push shit like abortion bills or trans stuff but I'd commit war crimes for a Klondike Bar, so I don't really care
It's quite respectable you're putting your own skills to work. Canvassing is not easy I'm glad to see it's working out for you.
 

unyuns

unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns *make beat noise with the mouth to avail*
Hellovan Onion
Yep. I've done it before on a few different campaigns but those were for political/ecological petitions. The last one I crushed so well they had to double the daily quota for everyone, which didn't make me popular with my coworkers but fuck em, they weren't the ones paying me.
This particular company I'm with is rather leftist and I might have to push shit like abortion bills or trans stuff but I'd commit war crimes for a Klondike Bar, so I don't really care
if people anger for you to compromise belief to money. they are not understand poor poor feeling.
 
More work per dollar than necessary is working for free.
Oh, I see. Idk, my work ethic is too strong just to do the minimum, especially when there's metrics involved. Plus putting some passion into it makes the day go quickly instead of doing just enough not to get fired then dragging my heels for the rest of the day.
Not everybody goes to work solely for the paycheck.
If the other people on the last campaign I did were there for anything other than easy money they wouldn't have been getting shitty numbers. I forget the exact quota but the expectations were so embarrassingly low that I had my quota done about two hours into an eight hour shift
 

unyuns

unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns unyuns *make beat noise with the mouth to avail*
Hellovan Onion
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