Big gender reveal: Vivian claims he once dated and fuqed a human sex doll - claims the human sex doll was a better lay than "Laura", but just as abusive. (speculation on who this was)
I am still working on the Livestream but I do want to quote this part at length because this is some deep and previously undisclosed Vivian lore.
Before anything else: The Queen Wins! LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!
Vivian brought up his sexual trauma and admitted that some of this was due to being groomed by adults:
"I am a deeply sexually traumatized individual. I first started when I was way too young because of older people. And would even say I have been a victim of sex cults before. So I have a lot of trauma regarding sexuality. I mean, it's fine, I enjoy it for the most part. There's so many things in life I enjoy more than it. Like, for instance, drugs. If I had to pick between drugs and sex? Like, drugs, every time, every time. (...) Like, I'm good at sex. I've never gotten any complaints. But, it just doesn't do much for me. What I really wanna do is make a documentary about asexuality, where I just basically talk to dozens of people who identify somewhere on that spectrum. And just go, like, really deep into interviews and questions and stuff and kinda put that all together. But that's a sometime-in-the-future thing."
This is sad actually. Imagine being so traumatized by sex that you prefer to get high on drugs over having sex. Vivian is both very traumatized and very, very, very drug-addicted if drugs seem better to him than sex. However, if you are traumatized by sex, why continue to watch all these sex movies that you praise as masterpieces on Letterboxd? Why read all this sex literature, like Story of the Eye, Story of O and the rest of all these smutbooks? Why submerge yourself constantly in all this sex stuff if you're asexual and not into sex? Also, claiming you're good at sex doesn't count. We need independent confirmation from the people involved.
"As I mentioned, sex cult stuff. The Portland trans community here is not great, it's not great. Maybe they've gotten better in the past 4 years. I hope so. For their sake."
If they haven't all contacted Covid and Monkeypox and died, perhaps they've finally learned to practice safe sex but giving the herpes epidemic in the US, I highly doubt it.
"And, un-simulated sex onscreen, because that's another thing I'm very interested in. See, that's the thing with asexuality and whatnot. I am more interested in portrayals of it[sex] on screen portrayals of sex, then I am with sex itself."
If you're more interested in depictions of sex than in IRL sex it's because you're pornsick. The porn has fried your already HRT fried brain so much that you can't enjoy normal sex anymore, so you can only watch others have sex and be a voyeur. That doesn't mean you're asexual, that means the HRT and the coom and whatever abuse the trannie sex cult raped you with, that all has killed your dick and your ability to enjoy sex. It's all very sad, but don't pretend this is some form of asexuality.
"I love un-simulated sex scenes."
Then why don't you just interview an intimacy coordinator? You know all that shit is all choreographed nowadays, don't you?
He's asked about Michael Haneke says he has only seen Funny Games, but says wants to see The Piano Teacher because of his "older women kink" (remember, this guy claims he's sexually traumatized and asexual as a result, but he still wants to subject himself to this movie):
Here he talks about that "Laura" guy again, the AGP that groomed him over the internet and brought him to the West Coast so he could escape Boone, NC where he was studying at the time. He claims that he and "Laura" broke up in September of 2019:
During this part, we get the Big Gender Reveal of this stream: Vivian claims that after he and "Laura" had broken up, he immediately started date and fuqing a human sex doll, whom he claims was a better lay than "Laura":
"Because, abusers come in groups, I fell into another one's bed, pretty quickly. And she was, a better lay at least, but, yeah, she looked like a fucking blow-up doll. She was one of "The Dolls". If you know, you know. But she was really into, you know, she watched Youtubers, and I did not. The most I had seen of LeftTube or BreadTube or anything like that before 2019, early 2020, was... the first time I went to hang out with this gurl[dude], back in 2018? I don't know... it was ContraPoints' AGP video. And I was not... I wasn't really... [I guess he means he was too busy gooning with his human sex doll to bother with Nyk's verbosity?] But she got me watching all of ContraPoints' videos. I watched all of Hbomberguy, Lindsay Ellis and PhilosophyTube, back before she dolled up. And basically what homegirl [homeboy] wanted to do, the girl [dude] I was dating,he was, like,he wanted to make Youtube videos a la ContraPoints. To make video essays and whatnot. And sohe turned to me, because I was the filmmaker and I had recently used my pandemic unemployment money to buy a nice camera, a microphone, and shit like that. And I also knew how to write, and she did not. So we had vague kinda plans to start up a Youtube channel, where I would write videos for her and whatnot. That fell through because she just wasn't... but over the course of, like, 2020, I remember that was when I discovered, I started branching out past the core BreadTube and started finding other smaller creators, like Lola Sebastian, the black Youtube renaissance, that started in 2020, that when Khadija Mbowe started uploading, F.D Signifier stared uploading, Foreign Man in a Foreign Land, like, a bunch of the Big Black Youtubers, that are big now, started in 2020. So, after my relationship with that person ended, I just kinda thought, well, I can, I can kinda do this. I have an English degree. I have everything that ContraPoints does, except for the shitload of money. [If only he knew about Nyk's other mainstream multi-millionaire nepotistic connections... shall I tell him? That's Nyk's cousin, Vivian. Nyk himself told everyone so on a Livestream.] So I figured, why not? It took me a really long time to make any videos. I did an early version of my "The Thin Pink Line" video with my Genderweird theory in it. Not nearly as polished as the one that is on my channel now. It was an early version and I am glad it's not on the internet anymore. There was that and the Euphoria video, which I did release on my channel last year, so you can go and see that if you want, it's the earliest video I've ever made. But it took me a really long time to finish the Euphoria video, so I remember I finished it at, like, the beginning of February 2021. And I was disillusioned at that point. I was like, no, this is, fucking, I'm not cut out for this. So I stayed in for, like, 4 or 5 months, did a fuckload of drugs, and wrote two really amazing screenplays, like, if I do say so myself, they're fantastic, and one day people might be actually able to read them. [Prove that they're actually good, Vivian. Get them on Blacklist.] So, yeah, I did that. 2021 was a rough time for me. Materially, things were pretty well. Pandemic unemployment shit? Great! It just goes to show, the government can just give us money on a monthly basis and things be alright. And then it was into the summer of 2021 when I started to re-evaluate and I started seeing things from new creators that started popping up.
When Vivian describes dating someone who looks like a blow-up doll, some might imagine him as Madonna's secret trannie, but my mind immediately went to Juliette Stray, a t-porn actor whose outrageous backstory was brought to my attention on, where else, KF. Juliette is probably the most extreme example of a transgender coomer imaginable, someone who has succumbed so hard to his porn addiction that he has dedicated his life, mind and body to the coom. Juliette became notorious outside of t-porn circles when he wrote a gigantic megapost on Reddit (titled something to effect of "How I Stopped Worrying and Learned To Love Plastic"), complete with links to various imgur images for evidence, detailing his descent into coomer hell, starting his his EPE teenage gothic BDSM porn addiction on USENET, his grooming in chat-rooms by online BDSM mistresses, through gay sex clubs to his quest to become a TIM copy of Lola Ferrari, finding an online sugar daddy willing to pay for all of his increasingly more disfiguring and dehumanizing plastic surgeries in exchange for private sex videos, even pulling a Genesis P'Orridge towards the end of the narrative and having surgeries together with his "girlfriend". I no longer have the link to the archive.is mirror of this Reddit post but it's still somewhere on KF. I don't know why I am thinking of Juliette (according to his Reddit post, Juliette has had sex with an endless stream of men but he's had biological woman girlfriends his whole life, so I don't see how Vivian would fit into this, I think it was all before his time anyway), when there are so many other coomer troons who were inspired by his Reddit post and copied what he did. Perhaps because, when Vivian does his nervous laughter, it kinda sounds a little bit like Juliette's nervous laughter? I don't know if that's imitation or coincidence or something that just happens when the HRT and the coom has fried your brain. Most telling is the fact that the most satisfying sex that Vivian claims to have ever had was with a human trying to resemble a blow up doll. No wonder he now prefers drugs over sex.
His room is a typical troon mess BTW, look at all the clothes and bedsheets thrown on the floor, you'd think for someone who doesn't have sex he'd take the extra time to clean his room a bit: