This is a work in progress guide to the kiwi farms culture, slang, and inside jokes. All suggestions, edits, and input is welcome
History
January 2013: The "new" CWCki Forums is founded by Null
Sometime in 2013: People begin talking about alternate "lolcows" in Off-Topic, including an on-going search to find the "next Chris". Null attempts to create a forum to split off this discussion
Early 2014: A lolcow, Jace Connors, comes into CWCki Forum's radar as a lolcow
September 2014: Ratings are introduced, previously there was only an "Mm, Yeah" (and "QUOTE ME NOW") button. The Horrifying rating comes in soon
November 2014: Null announces a rebranding of the site. A popular choice is "Kiwi Farms", based after Jace mispronounced it in a video earlier that year.
December 2016: Events & News subforum is archived. Beauty Parlor is created, initially with a set theme of purple and black (as opposed to normal green and black). Most Beauty Parlor threads were long-running lolcow threads.
January 2017: Kiwi Farms is shut down following serious threats on Null's family.
February 2017: Kiwi Farms reopens.
Late 2017: A Russell Greer subforum is created but archived within the period of a few months.
September 2019: Site hacked, revealing many PMs and user emails. Despite passwords remaining secure and no content lost, many users end up deleting their accounts.
Glossary
Josh / Null - owner of the site
A-Logging - generally taking things too seriously or getting angry at a lolcow. Obsessive posts about how bad an individual is.
white knight / white-knighting - coming to the defense of someone perceived irredeemable to their audience
Oldfag - old user of the site
Newfag - new user of the site
True & Honest - means user has given Josh $20
ruse cruise - the journey one is taken on when they are being trolled
Sperg / sperging - retarded rambling. A short form of the word “Asperger’s,”
Powerlevel - To powerlevel is to reveal information about yourself that is better off being private. Powerleveling is not any personal stories, just embarrassing 'TMI'.
powerword - someone’s real, legal name
Gay Ops - A term used by people involved in Internet Drama to describe secret, coordinated efforts conducted with intent to harm. Think Whisper Campaigns, but autistic.
tugboat - disability payments
sockpuppet - to make multiple accounts on a website for the purpose of getting around the rules
Lolcows - people and groups whose eccentric or foolish behavior can be “milked” for amusement and laughs.
chimp out - a dramatic outburst or tantrum
Subforums
Lolcows
Most of the subcategories are suffixed “-cow”: artcow, skitzocow, horrorcow, dramacow. These subcategories as well as information on how to classify the various types of cows can be seen in the flowchart below.
Animal Control
Animal Control, commonly referred to as ‘AC’ is the most vile board on Kiwi Farms. Animal control is infested with internal and external gay-ops and is generally a barely moderated cesspit. The board was personally created by Josh with the goal of furries eating each other alive.
Beauty Parlor
Aside from the 5 tags listed in the flowchart below, the Beauty Parlour has 3 other tags. Community, Off-Topic, and Inactive.
Community: If there is a group of Beauty or Cosplay related snowflakes, lolcows, or a gossip website. Any movement, hashtag, congregation of people or specific websites would get this tag.
Off-Topic: The Off-Topic tag is for threads that are discussing issues related to the Beauty Parlour board, but aren't lolcows, snowflakes, or trainwrecks. Such as news, tips, and the like.
Inactive: Inactive is a tag that is common to all lolcow-related subforums (except for Community Watch) on Kiwi Farms. It is used for people of interest that are deceased, incarcerated, or have otherwise quit the internet entirely or have disappeared.
Community Watch
A Plagued thread is no longer about laughing at a community of autists, it's been taken over by autists and is a now a thread dedicated to sperging about the topic of that community
Diseased and Infected are lesser degrees of Plagued, where the thread is still mostly or at least partially on-topic.
Stickers
NAME | ICON | ICON MEANING | USAGE | SCORE MODIFIER |
---|
Agree | | A checkmark typically used to show approval. | When a user agrees with a sentiment or statement, sometimes ironically. | +1 |
Autistic | | A puzzle piece, which is a symbol typically used for organizations which represent or study things related autism. | Generally any obsessive, strange, or disturbing behavior. Is also used to express a user's disagreement or dislike. Occasionally used on posts which literally are about autism or display puzzle pieces. Anyone who posts on Articles & News should be given this rating. | 0 |
DRINK! | | A cocktail glass with delicious and thirst-quenching kiwi juice. | Donators-only. A reference to an incredibly short-lived meme where people express their extreme approval of another by insisting they "drink." Used when the user wishes to perform a toast in celebration of some achievement, compelling statement, or assertive action. Occasionally used to literally reference the action of drinking, such as on posts referencing thirst or alcohol. | +1 |
Deviant | | A stylized rendering of the dirty, nasty teeth of TJ Church, whose vice of choice was writing erotic fiction. | Donators-only, and particularly coveted (for giving, that is). Denotes the receiver as "deviant" in some way, or used to express disgust, usually in regards to some sort of sexual preference, but can be used in jest such as for expressing a minor disagreement or ironically for commonly-held or mundane opinions. Anyone who uses Kiwifarms' light mode should be awarded this rating upon being exposed. | -1 |
Disagree | | An "X" used to show disapproval. | When a user disagrees with a sentiment or statement, or just sometimes ironically. | 0 |
Dislike | | A thumbs-down icon used in many websites. | Possibly the least-used rating outside of boards with restricted ratings. Used to show dislike of a post, but has such a generalized meaning that most users will opt to use other ratings instead. Getting somebody to use this is honestly an achievement in of itself, and it's probably only even included to serve opposite of the "Like" rating. | -1 |
Dumb | | A trashcan, implying the user's opinion or post should be discarded. | Often only to express extreme negativity compared to other ratings, and is usually given to particularly bad posts, whether due to content, quality, or relevance. Very rarely is used in response to something the user genuinely thinks is "dumb," such as a bad pun or silly logic. | -1 |
Feels | | A heart. A stylized one, not the real kind. | A reference to the "feels" meme, which is used to describe strong emotion such as happiness, sadness, or calmness. In general, this is used for posts which are sentimental, endearing, or simply expresses a feeling the user relates to. The easiest way to entice others to give this rating is to post pictures of cute animals. | +1 |
Horrifying | | A piercing, namely the perineum piercing owned by Chris Chan he deemed as the "un-clit," which his poor hygiene caused his body to reject. | Originally donators-only. Given to posts which are, as the name implies, "horrifying." Usually these are posts which relay tales of horror, disgusting images, or unnerving recollections. Is also used ironically when users give mundane or obvious statements. This is a "soft" or "nicer" version of Islamic Content. Was once donators-only, but was given to all users most likely through popular demand. | 0 |
Informative | | A lowercase "i," a symbol often used by information kiosks. | Awarded to posts the user deems as "informative," usually those who share screenshots of lolcows, archives, or genuinely enlightening explanations. Is also used ironically for obvious or incorrect statements. This rating gives the highest positive value, since users should be rewarded for being informative, after all. | +3 |
Islamic Content | | A green star in a moon, a symbol of Islam. Its usage is a reference to Jace Connors, who would refer to imagery he disliked as such. | For particularly disgusting posts, usually images which include gore or sexually explicit material. Occasionally used for posts which genuinely include content regarding the religion of Islam. Is used less often than Horrifying because it gives a negative score. | -1 |
Late | | An old-fashioned alarm clock. | Posts which are "late," such as ones which share information which was already established or posts which restate commonly-held opinions. | -1 |
Like | | A thumbs-up icon used on various websites. | Shows any positive opinion towards a posts. It is the default rating, as well, so it's extensively used by lazy people. | +1 |
Lunacy | | A half-crescent moon, as a pun on the word "lunacy." | Posts which express insane views or that are incomprehensible. Is sometimes used ironically on posts which express common opinions or obvious information. Also used on posts which discuss the moon in some form as a joke. | -1 |
Mad At The Internet | | A top hat, a reference to Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto, who conflated Chris Chan with literal war criminals and wore the headwear. | People expressing genuine anger or a desire for violence, or at least to those who are perceived as such. Also used on posts which highly exaggerate a strong and negative reaction to a typically mundane or only slightly inoffensive subject. This is usually just seen when two people start arguing as they rate each other with it. Gives the most negative score, since posts which this applies to are highly reductive or detracting. | -2 |
MATI Moai Garbage TMI Sperging Deviant Retard | | A moai island head wearing a top hat with an autism symbol on it, sporting a scouter and a deviant smile while sitting inside a trash can. | We knew the world would not be the same. A few people laughed, a few people cried. Most people were silent. I remembered the line from the Hindu scripture, the Bhagavad Gita; Vishnu is trying to persuade the Prince that he should do his duty and, to impress him, takes on his multi-armed form and says, "Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds." I suppose we all thought that, one way or another. | -∞ |
Optimistic | | A rainbow missing a band of indigo for some reason. | Posts which seem naive or overly hopeful, including posts which express the reliance or expectation of the basic competency for something. Also used on posts regarding actual rainbows or which display a variety of colors, or in reference to the gay pride flag. | 0 |
Political Sperging | | A moai head, a reference to a meme where the emoji is used for intentionally irreverent or pointless comments. | Posts which indulge in pointless arguing/complaining about politics when it isn't relevant or the political points being stated are overdone. | -1 |
Semper Fi | | A marine corps service medal, a reference to Jace Connors, who was obsessed with becoming a marine and would utter this phrase as kudos. | Donators-only. Used in exactly the same situations as "Winner," but is more special because only donators can give it, and carries a stronger significance to Kiwifarms as a community. Sometimes is given to posts involving the military in some form. | +2 |
TMI | | A scouter from the manga/anime "Dragonball," used to display the information of a target. | Originally called "power level," now called TMI (which stands for "Too Much Information"), given to posts which offers needlessly excessive or revealing information on its own poster, especially when it is unsolicited, unrelated, or embarrassing. Openly talking about oneself is also called "power leveling." Also used on posts jokingly where users reveal obvious information, pretending it is meant to be a "secret." | 0 |
Thunk-Provoking | | The "thinking" emoji which in of itself has become a meme. | Is so generally used, can mean anything from the simple acknowledgement that the giver read the post or that they genuinely found it thought-provoking. Mostly used ironically on posts which offer dubious or obvious predictions or information. | 0 |
Winner | | A simplified military service medal. | Rewarded to those who make anything seen as well-made or highly entertaining, such as an excellently crafted joke, a comprehensive collection of information, or an impressive art piece. Was once swapped to a German service medal when the forum was temporarily under a German domain. | +2 |
Achievement | | A trophy, most likely referencing "achievement" systems from modern video games. | Admin-only. Given to posts which the admin particularly liked, which typically are high-effort information dumps but occasionally are simple joke posts which were funny. | +50 |